What are we doing here, folks? Like seriously, what the hell is going on here? One of the most anticipated horror releases in the horror film community, and we get… this. Let’s be real here. 28 Days Later was ahead of its time. It obviously wasn’t for everyone, but it set up the franchise with a good base to at least work with. 28 Weeks Later was just alright. Everyone raved about the opening scene, and I agree that it was nicely done. While it was just alright, the movie still had polish and moved the franchise further. Now with 28 Years Later, the audiences are expecting something big. Like really, really big. Fans know that no trailer is necessary for this one. It’s going to be at least either a day one watch in the theaters or ASAP once it gets digitally released for streaming. But holyyyyyy shiiiittt… this likely will be one of the worst letdowns of the year.

I only had two assumptions going in: that there will be zombies and that everyone in the previous two movies won’t make an appearance. OK, like no shit on the first one. The second one at first I thought wouldn’t be possible but then again, we’re only talking 28 years from the first. Jim from 28 Days Later survived in the end so I couldn’t count out a quick guest appearance by Cillian Murphy. Anyways, it doesn’t matter. He probably saw the script and plot of this movie and did all he could to stay away from it. But alas, I’m partly wrong because he’s slated to be in part two of this series. That gives me some glimmer of hope that it won’t be trash like this one. There’s obviously a bunch of stuff that I did not like but where to start first? Oh right, how about the plot.

So basically, 28 Years Later feels more like a coming-of-age story as it revolves around a young boy performing his rites to manhood (I guess?) by heading out of his safe sanctuary and hunting his first zombie along with foraging for food and other items. He’s too small and young to do it alone, so his dad tags along. Like right off the bat, the story just felt…not right. It’s not because the story itself is off, but rather you can feel the direction of the movie franchise going downhill. And, it doesn’t get any better from there. Like seriously, why are we focusing on this young boy? WHY?! There’s nothing special about him. In the first movie, Cillian Murphy as Jim wakes up in the hospital as a lone survivor in a world gone crazy. In the second, we have Jeremy Renner Doyle, a bad ass sniper. Here in the third, we have……Spike. A good kid who cares for his mom and will do whatever it takes to get her mysterious illness cured. I mean cool, but hardly the most exciting. I mean, if they had a way to meaningfully advance the overall plot of the Rage Virus and the 28 X franchise itself, then okay, I might have been less frustrated, but as it is, it’s hard to accept what we got instead.

OK, let’s talk about the zombies. Like seriously, who are they trying to fool? I saw through it the first time they appeared on screen. These dudes seem to be trying so hard to copy the anime Attack on Titans, especially with the whole naked, crazy/silly running motion thing. It worked eerily well on the anime and it kind of works here. But they simply do not get enough screen time. In addition, those fat and slow-crawling zombies were hilarious. It reminded me of some Doom game or something. And seriously, an Alpha? How about using some screen time to tell us how in the years since the last movie the virus mutated? FFS this whole movie felt like it was Ground Zero and not “28 years later”. And oh yeah, good idea to just numb the Alpha and leave him there instead of, you know, killing it so it doesn’t, you know, umm…come after you again. I mean that’s just me.

Oh, and let’s not forget that ending. What kind of good crap did they smoke to come up with that? Admittedly, I’m not a huge fan of this franchise, so I don’t know every single little detail; so excuse me for not knowing WTF those Teletubby weirdos are that showed up to save Spike. At that point, I was just glad the movie ended. So what did I learn that I felt was important? Well, I guess that would be that babies from pregnant zombie women aren’t infected with the virus. But did she become pregnant before she was infected or after? Was the baby daddy the Alpha dude? Does this mean that they still have some sort of sentience after being infected? ‘Cause bro seemed pretty pissed in the bus scene. Anyway, I’m searching things up, and it seems that a third movie may be in the works to conclude 28 Years Later as a trilogy set. Things aren’t off to a good start in this first one, so things better look up in the second. It seriously can’t get worst this one. Also, please understand that the majority of my frustration here is not geared towards the actual movie itself as I think it may make for a better standalone movie. Instead, it’s directed more towards the movie in relation to the franchise itself.